Take the First Step

Be not afraid of going forward. Be afraid of standing still.
— Japanese Proverb

Making moves in the direction of your goals, dreams and aspirations is always a much wiser choices than sitting still, waiting for life to happen for you.  It is so necessary to put massive action behind your great ideas.  If not, you'll be that person who has all the best ideas, but no results.  

I get it ... taking massive action requires you to change your mindset and in some cases, change your beliefs.  

A lot of us grown folks have been conditioned to believe that the Safe Route of living is the best route.  When in actuality, sometimes the Risky Route is the ultimate pathway to living a life of your own design.  

If you're unwilling to take risks, then you are limiting your access to opportunity.  If your opportunity is limited, so is your success.  

Think of all the people who shoulda, coulda and woulda lived a life they are truly proud of; but didn't.  Do you want to be one of those people?  When you "peace out" of this life, don't you want to know that you LIVED it?!  

Playing it safe can create such a HUGE barrier between YOU and the LIFE you really want.  While it may seem wise to play it safe, the truth is ... not a lot happens in the "safe zone" - Now don't get me wrong, I'm not saying to drive recklessly or live life without precaution.  There is a difference between living with caution and living in FEAR.  

We have to be willing to "throw a little caution to the wind" and TRUST that we are always going to be protected from hurt, harm and danger when we are pursuing our dreams.  Otherwise, we are really missing out.  

Think back to childhood - the good times - when you were fearlessly willing to swing a little higher on the swings at the playground.  Just so you could experience that momentary feeling of weightlessness; maybe even the feeling of flying.  You were fearless in those moments.  Or if not fearless, you were willing to do it afraid.  

As adults, we often allow our failures or what I like to call 'Mis-Takes' - meaning, instead of viewing a mistake as a failure, just see it for what it really is:  a moment of imperfection.  That's all.  So when we allow our mis-takes to cripple us and prevent us from taking any action, then we're screwed!  

How will we ever experience a life we can really be proud of if we are unwilling to take the first step?  There's time when its best to sit still; and there are times when stillness becomes stagnant.

Be willing to take the first step today.  Step outside your comfort zone.  Throw a little of your caution to the wind.  Trust that you are protected and provided for.  Then just go for it! 


Immediate Gratification vs. Virtuous Patience

Patience is bitter; but fruit is sweet.
— Jean-Jacques Rousseau

A friend of mine in college would always tell me, "Patience is a virtue." - being patient is often easier said than done.  Why?  Because we want what we want; and we want it RIGHT NOW.  

In this day and age, we can have just about anything we want delivered to our door.  Whether its a date from Tinder, a sushi dinner from Postmates, groceries from Amazon or a black car with driver from Uber.  

The point is, we don't have to wait for much these days.  So the concept of patience is sort of diminished because of the advances in technology and mindset of the creators of today.  There's still hope.  People like myself.  Those of us from "Gen X" who still remember the time before cell phones and social media, it is up to us to bridge the gap!

Those of us who have children - like my 15 year old son - often find ourselves having conversations requiring us to teach our youth the value and virtue of practicing patience.  I find myself having chats with my son on nearly a daily basis about why its a good idea for him to "plant seeds in his life now, that he can manifest in his future".  

Then I see the blank stare on his face; and can feel him waiting for the "lecture" to be over.  

The story of the acorn, that while it began humble, eventually becomes a massive Oak Tree is really about patience.  Patience and determination.  While immediate gratification may seem like a good thing - the truth is, there's a lot of patience and determination that feeds into the existence of the things we get to do, be and have.  

Think of it this way, if the creators of Social Media ... actually if the creators of THE INTERNET (lol to my Auntie .. inside jokes inserted here) didn't have the vision, determination and patience to see it fruition, we wouldn't have cool things like FaceTime.  Who doesn't love FaceTime?  I sure do!  I like that no matter where I am in the WORLD, I can see my son's face, hear his voice and just connect with him.  

If not for the patience of someone else, I would be without some of the luxuries I rely on every day. 

Some people say things like, 'Time waits for no one' - and those people are correct.  Time does not wait; but YOU can.  Waiting doesn't mean sitting around like a bump on a log, literally waiting for life to happen around you.  It means waiting with purpose, with patience and determination.  The results of patience are in many cases, a little more gratifying that what comes instantly.  

Think about it.  Would you rather have a pizza baked in a brick oven, or a microwave?  I will take the brick oven any day. 

Find some space in your day to exercise patience.  You may be pretty satisfied with the outcome. 



And then there was none ...

You only lose what you cling to.
— Buddha

Learning the valuable lesson of the power of release is probably one of the greatest lessons life allows us to experience. We as humans have a great tendency to develop attachments to what we get to feel, touch, smell, taste, etc.  Our senses create space for attachment.  When we learn to observe our senses, without becoming attached to the experiences that come from them, we start to allow ourselves to live freely.  

You may be thinking, "How am I supposed to feel, touch, smell and taste life without becoming attached to it??" - it can be kinda tricky at first.  

Think of this way.  Your favorite meal.  Whatever it may be.  You have an image of it in mind.  Perhaps you can smell it.  Or even begin to taste it.  As of now, you don't have your favorite meal in front of you.  But the connection to the experience of having it is very real for you, right?  Depending on what your favorite meal is, you may never have it again.  That doesn't stop you from remembering how delicious it is.  You remember because you have an attachment to it.  

Attachments are not a "bad" thing per se.  However, some believe that attachments are what lead to human suffering.  Our attachments to the material things we acquire.  Our attachments to our families, friends and lovers.  Even attachments to our physical bodies.  We humans are a lot like magnets.  We find something we like and we stick to it.  Sometimes getting us to release an attachment is as difficult as trying to pry two strong magnets apart from one another.  

Not an easy task.

Also, not an impossible one.  

Let's look at our attachments to people.  We like people.  We love people.  Some people we feel or believe we cannot exist without.  Why?  We are attached to the feelings we have about having people in our lives.  Our children, our siblings, our friends and lovers are some of the most valuable attachments we ever experience. Which is why when the person is no longer around, we experience sadness, disappointment and maybe even depression. Also known as suffering.

We suffer when we are apart from our loved ones.  In one way or another, we feel a lack or scarcity in their absence.  Sometimes its hard for us to even accept.  We are so attached to the good feelings we have about people; that when they are no longer physically present, we suffer.  

However, just like that favorite meal.  The way you can smell it, taste it and even enjoy it while its not present in the physical.  You can experience the same enjoyment about people who are no longer present in the physical.  One thing we are allowed to hold onto is our feelings.  We can release people, material things and even beliefs.  We get to hold on to how we feel.  

Our feelings, emotional intelligence and mindful connection to our true selves is necessary for us to remain human.  If we detach from our emotional experiences, we are no different than robots.  

It is healthy for us to practice detachment, and learn how to create the feeling of joy that we receive as a supposed result of attachment, on our own.  We don't need people or material things to feel whole, joyful or complete.  We can create that all on our own.  That way, when we do get to have great people, cool experiences or awesome things our lives; its just a bonus! 

Give yourself permission to detach today.  Then see if you can invite some of those good feelings to show up.  Maybe remind yourself that you get to be happy, even though you are letting go. In the end, when you lay your head to rest each night, the only element who can really bring you joy, is you.  Make some room for joy.


Cowards Never Own Their Shit ...

Cowards always avoid difficulty, while the brave are always looking for opportunity in a difficult situation.
— Gunz

Have you ever come in contact with a coward?  Chances are, if you've lived enough life, you have. Or perhaps a former version of yourself was a coward.  Either way, today, I am writing about Cowards.  

I googled the definition of a coward today and here is what I found:  a person who lacks the courage to do or endure dangerous or unpleasant things; excessively afraid of danger or pain ... a dog with its tail between its legs.

In my 39 years, I've been faced with very few cowards.  In fact, with the exception of maybe 2-3 people I've encountered, most people I know are pretty damn brave.  I've been privileged to share spaces with Cancer survivors.  I've gotten to know those who are overcoming the challenges of anxiety, depression, and eating disorders.  I even got to be parented by a man who delivered himself from harsh drug addiction.  

From what they have shared with me, there were moments when they were in their darkest hours and they wanted to throw in the towel, give up on themselves or others and just quit.  But something in them.  Something deep down in the root of their being, gave them the PUSH to be brave.  

We all have some shit ... some stuff that we are not proud of.  Things we've said or done.  Promises or agreements we've broken with ourselves or others.  Places we've been that we know we never want to revisit.  Not a one of us is without flaw or fear.

We do get to make a choice.  We get to choose to be COURAGEOUS or COWARDLY.  The choice is yours.  In case you've convinced yourself otherwise, you do get to CHOOSE how you want to approach and react to life.  No one decides that for you.

Some people say things like, "I'm a work in progress ... " well a work in progress eventually reaches a point of completion, right?  So if you've been working, in progress to become a braver human being; but you're still behaving like a coward ... Hmmm - that doesn't seem like any progress is being made.  Without progress, we experience complacency.

For instance, I recently encountered a Coward.  This person's outward persona of a highly confident, successful and intelligent human being was pretty damn convincing.  You know why? Because underneath every Coward lives a Hero (or Heroine).  Its just up to YOU (if you're being a Coward right now) to decide to step into your Courageous self.

Being courageous doesn't mean being ruthless.  Being heroic doesn't mean being unkind.  Being courageous requires bravery.  Belief in ones ability to overcome whatever negative self-talk, negative beliefs or other crap you're carrying around with you that causes you to walk with your head down in shame.  

Being brave doesn't mean you have to climb Everest or accomplish some massive physical feat.  Being courageous simply means choosing to face your greatest fears and step through them anyway.  

For some, their greatest fear is accepting love.  For other's, the fear is being sublimely happy.  NO matter what the fear is, if you allow it to take hold of you, it will lead you in and out of some pretty shitty scenarios; and leave a wake of disappointment behind you.  

Being a coward doesn't allow you the room to be accountable.  It often puts you in spaces where deceit and lies are your only language.  You become a snake-like, untrustworthy being who most would avoid being around.  When really, deep down, you're just a little scared of trying something new.  

Perhaps you're carrying shame about choices you made or experiences of your past.  Just know, you cannot outrun yourself.  Many have tried and failed.  Where ever you go, there YOU ARE.  

If we allow our fears to turn us into something other than our authentic self - the result is toxic.  

If your'e dealing with a coward today - just dust your shoulders off.  

Instead of expecting a Coward to own their shit.  Or to be accountable, responsible or reliable.  When faced with a coward, look them in the eyes and see, they are doing the best they can.  

Pray for the coward.  Send them love and light.  Trust that one day, when the coward finds their inner courage, they may have the "balls" to step through their fears.  Don't spend too much time trying to "call them on their shit" because ... they are not ready to own it.

A wise person once said: "You cannot be a hero without being a coward." - George Bernard Shaw

We all have a journey to greatness.  Sometimes that journey takes us through a cowardly stage, where are fears are running the show.  You get to decide when you're ready for your Hero to emerge.  



Let Your Dreams Exceed Your Experience

If you believe you can, then you will. If you believe you can’t, then you won’t.
— Kei Rai

Have you every considered allowing your dreams to exceed your experiences?  Meaning, instead of dreaming or thinking about what you can create in your life based on what you've already done, do you consider doing ANYTHING you want - regardless of what's happened in your past?

We often define our ability to create experiences in the present based on what we've done in the past.  Instead of looking at the past as a source for reflection, we see it as a source of direction.  If we allow ourselves to be directed by our past, where do you think we will end up?  Most likely, back where we started from.  

Don't get me wrong, sometimes its a good idea to go back to square one.  To refresh, rethink and maybe retool some of your dreams, goals or thoughts.  As we know, we can't actually go back in time and redo anything.  We can look at our past.  Take note of some lessons we've learned; then get back to the present and start moving forward. 

If we let ourselves dream FORWARD then the possibilities are limitless. 

On the other hand, if we are dreaming based on what we could not do, what we "failed" or lost, chances are we are limiting our dreams.  Who wants to limit their dreams?  Do you?  I surely don't.  

The way I see it is: if I put limitations on my dreams, that's like trying to put limitations on God.  And we know that just ain't possible. Right?

Well if you don't know, now you know.  It is not possible to put limitations on a limitless, abundance, omnipotent and omniscient source of all creation.  

When you dream, set intentions or even just think about what you want to attract and experience  in your life, you are tapping into an already existing partnership with the Divine Universe.  The Universe is literally chillin' - waiting for you to get with the program and start allowing it to manifest the life you really want. 

If you are busy thinking about what you didn't get in the past, then you're waisting some precious time.  Wouldn't you rather spend time thinking about what you can experience now?  Maybe even put some deposits into your Future Dreams box.  

Bottom line here is this:  Know that anything you mind can conceive, can and will become your reality.  If you give it attention.  Energy (aka life) flows where attention goes.  You are the captain of your ship.  You are runnin' things in your life.  

Make the choice to take control of your life today and let your dreams exceed your past experience. 


Give Yourself Permission to Play

Give Yourself Permission to Play

Giving yourself permission to play allows you a chance to reset each day.  Instead of becoming these boring, overworked, stressed out adults - we get to reconnect with the child spirit that lives inside us.  When we were children, we thought pretty much anything was possible.  We believed in the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy and even Santa Clause.  Some adults probably still do.  

Be Willing to Blossom

A flower does not think of competing with the flowers next to it. It just BLOOMS.

Be willing to blossom today.  You've spent a lot of time contemplating.  Now its time for you to take some massive action.  Give yourself a chance to get uncomfortable today. Try something different and watch yourself bloom.  

We all have dreams, goals and aspirations.  Whatever you call it, we all have desires for our lives.  Sometimes we get stuck in a 'holding pattern' of planning.  We have some really AMAZING plans.

One of my many mentors once told me, "A dream is just a dream.  A dream with a PLAN is a GOAL. " - from that time forward, I have devised some of the best plans ever.  There's another saying that goes something like this, "Plans without ACTION are just ideas." - now, I may have made up that last quote.  But it sounds like a pretty worthy one to commit to memory.  

While planning is very necessary part of creating the lifestyle you can truly be proud of, sometimes we get stuck in PLANNING and never take an action. Then wonder, why things are not panning out in our lives the way we want them to.  

Think of it like this: have you ever planned a dream vacation?  Really taken the time to think about where you want to go and what you want to experience.  Maybe even created a vision board to use as a manifestation tool to attract the dream vacation into your life.  Now ask yourself, "Will looking at the vision board and intentionally thinking about your dream vacation get you there?" - not without action.  Without action, your dream vacation will remain out of your reach.  

Taking action can be a pretty scary thing.  Why?  Well because we cannot always predict the outcome of every plan. No matter how much effort we put into creating a "fool proof" plan, something unexpected can happen.  

For instance, your dream vacation could be a trip to Italy and the day you're expected to board your fight, your passport could be missing from your bag.  Or, on the other hand you could unexpectedly get upgraded to first class.  Who knows what will happen until you take some action and BLOOM already!

If you want to experience newness in your life, you have to be willing to BLOOM out of your comfort zone.  You must be courageous enough to create plans for your dreams and then willing to BLOOM into action.  

Are you unsure how to create plans for your dreams?  If so, you're in luck! I'm a great resource for you to tap into.  Send me a message and let me help you blossom.



Be Seen

Risk being seen in all of your glory.
— Jim Carrey



Be willing to be seen today.  Instead of making yourself small, take up a lot of space today!  Let your voice be heard.  Share a new idea with someone you trust.  Volunteer to do something for someone in need. 

All too often, many of us shrink ourselves to fit into likability.  Meaning, instead of showing up in the world, being our full an complete selves; we modify who we are in hopes of gaining more acceptance or being more likable by others.  Ask yourself, if you aren't showing up as your whole self, then who exactly are you?

Here's a thought:  If you were a baby duck and one day, you got separated from your flock.  How would you locate other ducks?  Would you start to make sounds like a dog, cat or cow?  Probably not.  You would start quacking your ass off until the mama duck found you; and you rejoined your flock.   Why does the mama duck find her lost baby?  Because you (the baby duck) showed up as yourself.  Quacked your best quack; and BOOM ... like magic, your flock shows up.  

Building relationships kinda works the same way.  When we are little kids, we usually try and make friends with people we have something in common with, right?  Then as we become adults, we gravitate toward people with commonalities as well.  So if every "duck" is mooing like a cow, or howling like a dog, how will they find other ducks?

This is not to say that you should only build relationships with people who are EXACTLY like you.  The Universe has taken care of that.  You attract who and what you are.  Meaning, if you are an active, health enthusiast who enjoys cosplay.  You will probably find a tribe of people who have those same exact interests; and you won't have to try very hard to find them.  They will literally gravitate to you.  

BUT ...

You will only attract your tribe, if you are willing to "risk" being your whole and complete self, all day, every day.   Trying to be someone that you think will be more "likable" or "acceptable" may attract some people that in the long run, aren't really on the same vibe as you are.  You may even see yourself doing things that go against your internal grain, just to fit in.  

A lot of adults think that the desire to fit in ended in high school.  WRONG!  Everyone wants to fit in somewhere.  We human beings have an innate desire and need to connect with others.  We all want to be loved, liked and accepted.  

Believe it or not, there are a few adults who are still "shrinking"  themselves in order to fit in at work, in their families or even in romantic relationships.  Do you ever find yourself shrinking to become more likable; instead of being authentic, transparent and honest about who you really are?  

I've been there.  In those moments where I am about to walk into a room of new faces and I pause and ask myself, "Who I am gonna be when I walk into this room?" - sometimes the answer I hear in my head is "Just don't be too smart, too funny or too YOU". Do you ever tell yourself that you're being too YOU?  If so, you're not alone.  

Today, I invite you to be YOU - all the way.  



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